Approach vs Avoidance Based Goals

In the last 14 years in the fitness industry, we’ve helped a lot of people set a lot of different types of goals. These goals range from weight loss, weight gain, performance metrics, lifestyle changes, getting out of pain, and so on. There’s been a LOT of goals set.

And I wish I could say that everyone has achieved them, but that just isn’t the case. What most people do is set avoidance based goals rather than approach based goals, and avoidance goals very seldom bring us success.

So let’s talk about Approach Based Goals vs Avoidance Based Goals, and then you can figure out some approaches that are going to help you get to your goals!

APPROACH BASED GOALS

Approach Goals will inherently frame any changes that you need to make in a more positive light. This positive perspective will associate more positive emotions, self-evaluations, and thoughts to the process or habits you’re trying to build. If we’re building better systems, processes, and habits, we will eventually build a life that is set on auto-pilot. Make sense?

“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.” – James Clear.

With more positivity throughout a process, the greater your overall psychological well-being will be whilst in said process. We’re not talking about toxic positivity here, but those subtle positive moments that keep you thinking, “yeah I can do this” or “I’m very proud of myself for making these decisions.”

Overall, the approach based goals focus on the positive and not “the sacrifice,” and we humans perform better for longer and more consistently with positive reinforcement. The second we try to take something away, we want it more.

Examples of approach based goals:

• I’ll eat greens at every meal because it makes me feel better.
• I’ll aim for 3-4 workouts a week because it makes me feel strong.
• I’ll do my best at work so I can get a great performance review.
• I’ll go to sleep earlier instead of scrolling because I’ll feel better tomorrow.

I don’t know about you, but the approach base seems far more achievable!

AVOIDANCE BASED GOALS

Avoidance goals will without a doubt cast a negative shadow over the entire process! In the nutrition world, it really will make things feel like a “diet” rather than a lifestyle change. Nobody wants to feel like they’re on a diet. We don’t want to feel like we avoid things or have to make sacrifices. Enough build up of the negative emotion will lead you to one of those “eff it” weekends where you spend your days grubbing out. Raise your hand if you’ve been there!

Some will argue that avoidance goals really do work best for them. Fear and negative feelings are a great motivator for them. This can be absolutely true, but only for a short term. Fear and consequences are how we survive as humans in situations that could cause extreme pain or, y’know, dying (it’s best to avoid oncoming traffic, or avoid falling into the lion enclosure).

But if we’re looking at goals to help us be a fitter, happier, and healthier person for the long term, avoidance based goals can wear you the heck down!

We’ve all set some form of avoidance goal when it comes to our fitness and nutrition before.

• “I won’t eat junk food.”
• “I won’t eat fast food.”
• “I won’t take a day off of working out.”
• “I’m going to stay off my phone at night.”

Isn’t it funny how when you read, “I won’t eat junk food,” you immediately think of your favorite junk food? Mmmmm…. Anything salty and chip-based. 

You can handle that deprivation for a bit, but eventually it will wear on you, and you’ll end up at square one. 

HERE’S WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO.

Close your eyes and take 10 very slow deep breaths. In through the nose, and out through the nose.

After the 10th breath, ask yourself, “What am I trying to accomplish or maintain during Quarter 4?” 

For some, you might need to get after your nutrition and fully commit.

For some, you might need to audit your schedule and get back to the gym more frequently.

Others it might be getting to bed earlier to establish a better sleep routine.

For some, you might need to keep doing exactly what you’re doing, because you’re in a really good spot.

There’s no one size fits all here.

Once YOU have figured out what is best for you, I want you to take out a pen and paper, and write down some approach based goals / habits that you want to incorporate into your every day. Be careful not to fall into the avoidance trap. Use words like “I will” rather than “I won’t.” 

After you’ve written them down, send me an email with the goals. Sending it to someone will make it “real.” Amanda@CrossFitTorque.com 

I would even suggest having it visible and a reminder – is it on a note in your phone; is it hanging at your desk; is it on the fridge?

Let’s approach (get it?) the remainder of 2024 with some new goals that are positive and achievable, rather than goals that make us feel restricted and negative!

Figure out your new approach, and send them my way.

-Coach Amanda